There was something of a furore recently when it was revealed that a motorist in the UK had become the first driver to be convicted for hogging the middle-lane of a motorway.
It was a win for common sense and frustrated drivers the world over with many hailing the conviction, the fine and the penalty points that came with it as long overdue. As the author of the news piece for CompleteCar.ie I was front and centre of the hubbub that surrounded the case - strange then that I now find myself defending lane-hoggers.
Not this driver in particular, you'll understand (he was a berk who was given ample opportunity to pull over), nor middle-lane hoggers as a whole, as we do not have enough three lane roads for them to become the problem they are elsewhere. Instead, we have overtaking lane hoggers, or outside lane or fast lane or whatever you want to call it. They are a scourge on our roads, treating the right-hand lane of dual-carriageways or motorways as a regular driving lane and steadfastly refusing to yield. They are a source of ire at best and outright rage at worst often forcing other road users to illegally undertake them as they continue to their destination unaware of the problems they are causing around them.
Yet, it is not entirely their fault. You see, the only time our driving skill and understanding of the rules of the road are tested is during our Driving Test and the last time I checked the curriculum, lane discipline was not part of the test. In fact, a driver is not allowed venture near a motorway until after they have passed their test. This was not too much of an issue 10 or 15 years ago as the Irish motorway network consisted of the M50 and little else besides, but with most major urban areas now connected by motorway they are almost unavoidable and yet learner drivers receive no instruction on how to use them.
Due to the speeds involved and the sheer volume of traffic, motorways are amongst the most daunting driving challenges a new driver can face, but the Road Safety Authority would rather test a driver reversing around a corner than driving on a motorway. Yes, ok the reverse-around-a-corner part is less about possessing the actual ability to reverse around a corner and more about car control, but in an era of reversing cameras and parking sensors is it really relevant? Likewise, the hill start - an absolute mare to master when you are first learning to drive, but with most modern cars now featuring some sort of hill-hold capability, isn't it a bit pointless?
If you are lucky, your test route may include a section of dual-carriageway - the closest thing to a motorway you can legally experience at that point - and ideally your instructor will drill proper lane discipline into your head long before you venture near a test centre. Then again they may not, or the test route may not venture beyond regular single lane roads, which means it is on the driver to, by themselves, learn these things - and that is never going to work. Nobody is going to read the entire works of William Shakespeare just for the fun of it; no, we do it because we know we are going to be tested on it. State exams are the reason we can still quote Shylock's "If you prick us, do we not bleed?" monologue from the Merchant of Venice or know what the hell Pythagoras's theorem is.
We live in a country where the RSA has to take adverts out on TV and radio to remind drivers of the simple rules of the road, proving that the stick of enforcement has failed. We need to move back to the carrot of proper driver education. So, I Paul Healy, hereby propose a new Driving Test. One that takes our new road network and cars into account. Reversing around a corner will be replaced by parallel parking - same car control skills, but genuinely useful. The hours spent practising hill starts will be replaced by hours upon hours of learning how to use a roundabout - specifically what lane to be in for the exit you wish to use and, most importantly, lane discipline on dual-carriageways and motorways will be taught, examined and result in an instant failure if not adhered to.
Trying to teach someone after the fact is futile. We need to teach drivers the right way to use our roads before we let them loose on them. Then, and only then, can we begin the process of fining/convicting/publically flogging those who refuse to GET OUT OF THE BLOODY FASTLANE I'M LATE FOR WORK.